by Benjamin Allen | Feb 16, 2014 | reflections on grief, reflections on grief recovery
Everyone goes through loss. It is a part of all of us. Loss, whether it’s a relationship, a job, a dream, a loved one, or anything else takes up all the space one has. I have a friend who just lost his job and it has put a tremendous strain on both he and his wife....
by Benjamin Allen | Feb 16, 2014 | reflections on grief, reflections on grief recovery
There is no simple answer. This isn’t an infomercial exercise program or diet with easy answers and timeframes. This is life lived in the shadow of death. I have yet to experience a step-by-step guide that says, “do this and the pain will go away in just 12 easy...
by Benjamin Allen | Feb 16, 2014 | reflections on grief, reflections on grief recovery
Memories can both heal and hurt. Memories touch me as much as I touch them. Depending on the texture of the touch I can gauge how far my healing has come…and how far my healing has yet to go. In my world of the Afterloss healing has no set pattern, no linear...
by Benjamin Allen | Feb 16, 2014 | reflections on grief, reflections on grief recovery
There are sacred places and sacred moments where life intersects with loss and one meaning expands into another. Half Moon Bay, California is one of my most sacred of places. It was where Lydia and I collected beautiful memories early in our marriage. It was a place...
by Benjamin Allen | Feb 6, 2014 | reflections on grief, reflections on grief recovery
In my world of the Afterloss there is this giant mythological creature with two heads called Futility. One head constantly moans “if only” and the other head incessantly cries, “why?” In my first layer of loss Futility stalked me, haunted me and consumed me. Today I...
by Benjamin Allen | Feb 6, 2014 | reflections on grief, reflections on grief recovery
“Fear is just an illusion,” he said to me. But when this panic attack hit, the fear sure felt real. I gripped the steering wheel tightly as I drove through rush hour traffic, trying to stay focused on not crashing. I frantically made my way to the shoulder of the...