by Benjamin Allen | Mar 20, 2014 | reflections on grief, reflections on grief recovery, reintegration after loss
The difference between depression and grief is one of location. Grief begins in my heart and pulsates out into my world. Depression, for me, resides in the recessive realms of my life with no tangible center. Grief is like a thunderstorm that rains incessantly in my...
by Benjamin Allen | Mar 20, 2014 | reflections on grief, reflections on grief recovery, reintegration after loss
The theme song for my early days of living in sorrow and loss was “Running on Empty” by Jackson Browne. There simply wasn’t a lot of reserve left in the tank. Every day more was going out than coming in and I would run on empty until I fell into bed. I began to...
by Benjamin Allen | Mar 20, 2014 | reflections on grief, reflections on grief recovery, reintegration after loss
Loss took everything and it took everything I had left to make it through the day. In the initial aftermath of their deaths, and my remains, I inched my way through the moment.The outside world temporarily converged to provide comfort and scattered when all was said...
by Benjamin Allen | Mar 17, 2014 | reflections on grief, reflections on grief recovery, reintegration after loss
Who put a stopwatch on grief? Who are the powers that be? Who said, “Time’s up. Time to move on,” and left those living in loss to live in secret? Loss goes underground when we don’t play by the rules. No one actually says there is a right and wrong way to grieve. The...
by Benjamin Allen | Mar 17, 2014 | reflections on grief, reflections on grief recovery, reintegration after loss
Do you really know how I feel? Do you know what it’s like to wake up in the morning exhausted? Do you know what it feels like to break into tears at a grocery store by just picking up a cantaloupe? Do you know what it’s like not being able to breathe, not wanting to...
by Benjamin Allen | Mar 17, 2014 | reflections on grief, reflections on grief recovery, reintegration after loss
I had so many questions and so few answers. Our Afterloss did not begin with the first death. By the time we held Bryan for the last time we were three months into total devastation. Loss for us began with a phone call. Our world of Before was obliterated when the...
